I’m sure I’m one of the last ones to blog, but I’m not surprised. It always takes me some time to process things and reflect on how an event has shaped me. I still don’t think I can really appreciate it; none of us can. It’ll take weeks, months, and years from now, looking back; we may still be surprised at how these days have made us who we are. As a group, we talked a lot about not making this trip about us, but that’s incredibly difficult, if not impossible. We are by nature very self-focused. For me, Nashville flew by. Looking back, it feels like a snapshot in a very evolving phase of my life. Graduating in May, grad school in August. With things about to change so drastically, it’s really hitting me how important it is to seize every opportunity and live in the moment. This service trip really did that for me. None of us had to give up a week of our vacation and spend the money. But we did, and that is something to be proud of.
I said in the de-brief I realize how much complain, and it’s true. The weather, my lack of sleep, you name it and I had something negative to say. It is mind boggling how I could spend 8 hours working on devastated homes and lives, and in the evening, go back to thinking of myself first. True testament to the easy, pampered life I have become way too used to. But taking this step, and coming on this trip is also a testament to wanting to change that. It’s too easy to get wrapped up in our problems. I have always been so focused on getting the good grades, the LSAT score, and the acceptance letter. But that is not what life is about. That is not what I’m going to look back on in five years and miss. I can attach as much self-worth onto external things as I’d like, but they will never be enough. They can be taken away in an instant, as the people of Nashville know only too well. This trip really brought that into perspective. The town was so appreciative, so in awe of our willingness to help. They shouldn’t be. Kind, giving behavior, especially on the part of college students, should not be so shocking. And if we could change their outlook, remind them that there are people, better yet, complete strangers, thinking about them, I feel like it is one small, but big step to becoming a better person. Getting into a good law school would be great, but THAT is what life is really about.
By nature I am a reserved person and meeting new people intimidates me, but this group was phenomenal. It was really strange to realize that some of the people I met had not been in my life earlier. I guess there extra space in our hearts that we don’t know about, just waiting to be filled in by the right people.
Wherever you go from here, take pride in what we accomplished, and remain humble by what we saw.
<3 always, Anam
